Hello ladies and gentlemen,
I’m tired of people not picking up a book for whatever reason they got.
“Oh, I can’t focus long enough to finish them.”
“Oh, it’s too long.”
“Oh, there’s nothing that interests me out there.”
“Oh, books are for nerds.”
Screw you! I think it’s time for drastic measures to correct this issue—issue that might actually only be in my head since people are probably reading more than ever these days.
Without further ado, here’s what I think we should do to make the world great again.
Burn Down Libraries.
Imagine the revolution that would give birth following such a catastrophe. Based on social reaction theories and humankind’s love for mass gatherings—especially to protest against villainous governments—I believe such an event could lead people, even those who don’t read but love to riot, to want more libraries, more books, and more reading done henceforth!
Similar to the previously mentioned idea, I think that if we suddenly went back into an era of censorship—and with the help of social media especially—we’d be able to create another social outcry that will bring everyone to gather and promote reading indirectly. Think about it. The moment everyone has the feeling that their basic rights have been stripped from them, there is bound to be a revolution. Statistics on the reading habits of humankind will explode! And we all love numbers after all!
No more price tags.
Author’s salary? Publisher’s business? Economy? Fuggedaboutit! If there’s one thing that stops many from reading as much or even reading at all—despite libraries out there who lend out books for free but we all know that we’re consumers at heart and prefer owning things—it’s the price tag on books. Get rid of it! Make it all free! Make writing books, sharing books, and reading books, activities that are done out of pure love for them and not as means to survive within a money-grubbing society!
Hear me out. If we want others to read but have their willpower in the way of getting things done, I think torture might be a penultimate idea that could work wonders. All we need to do is bring back concentration camps or underground prisons! I mean, imagine how much good we can accomplish with this. We can even make those who SHOULD read (e.g. some presidents around the world) go through such a sentence to really change the world and then, progressively, get people in our social circle to read. Maybe the threat of torture alone could bring ALL to read!
After witnessing the stupidity of humankind with the ongoing COVID-19 epidemic, I had this epiphanic idea of how to make use of the media to get more reading done by our societies. It’s quite simple. Identify books as the cure to everything, from ignorance to the virus. Leave the rest to everyone out there on social media platforms and whatnot to spread the word and watch as even the dumbest of us all will pick up a book to try and find the answers that they have always been looking for.
Before I run for the exit, I just want to point out that I do not support any of these ideas—or maybe I do, you’ll never know.
I still think it would be cool if there were some kind of magical spell that could get people to realize the benefits of reading but I think that post will be for another day.
For the time being, pick up a book, read in isolation, and enjoy life. Oh, and don’t forget to take care of yourself. Happy reading! 🙂
What do you think?
How can we get others to read?
Till next time,